I was scheduled to do my long run this morning and I was going to get up and do it. I missed my spin class Friday so I told myself, No Excuses. I got a text from my running buddy this morning around 5:15 am saying that she was battling food poisoning and wasn’t going to make it to the 6 am run. I hadn’t even had time to respond to her when hubby’s phone rang. Hubby isn’t the type to talk on the phone, especially before he’s had his coffee so my heart jumped. 

I could hear my sister in-law’s voice on the phone. She’s got quite the volume and I could tell she wasn’t her bubbley self. Father in-law wasn’t doing well and they were headed to the hospital. We jumped out of bed and  stumbled around trying to find suitable clothes. We rushed up the gigantic hill that leads to the hospital entrance and dashed up the stairs to the CCU. 

My brother in-law was standing in the hallway. “Dad’s gone.” was all I remember him saying. At that instant my heart broke. Father in-law was sick for a long time and I know he’s not suffering anymore but the pain of him not being there is larger than I ever thought possible. I love my own family but we are not close for a number of reasons. I became very close to hubby’s dad and enjoyed all his cheesey science fiction movies and jokes. He was a lot like hubby and I know that I am going to miss him like crazy. 

This day has seemed to last forever. The never-ending, terrible, awful day. I haven’t picked myself up or kicked myself into gear. I have ate brownies (triple chocolate chunk) and pasta among other things. Today just doesn’t feel like a day to stick to a plan. Comfort food and cuddles are in store. For no, I choose to believe it’s a bad dream and I’ll let reality hit when it comes. The world has lost a truly amazing, kind, and selfless man. I count myself incredibly lucky to have been able to get to know him for the 5 years I have. One thing I know is that I will miss him like crazy. 

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